Being curious about the particular

Purple vetch flowers with ants climbing up the stalk

Noticing the little things. Underneath it all, we don’t want to be told that we are like everyone else. And just because we have similar tastes or do similar things doesn’t make us the same. Our differences are to be celebrated, not as a signifier of value but of uniqueness—the distinctive contribution we make to … Read more

Belonging is more than just fitting in…

Early spring pollination of skimmia buds

Conforming to be accepted isn’t belonging. It gives others, singular or group, control in return for something else. Whereas at its foundation, true belonging is being seen for who we are—and loved in the broadest sense. ‘May the frames of your belonging be generous enough for your dreams.’ And it is two-way. Because there is … Read more

On being known


We do not see ourselvesthe way that others see us,yet we are known. Known since before –before we knew, or evenasked the question: who am I? Known not in isolation,a number or location,but known in connection: who we are Indivisible, eternal and temporal,known in being, becauseto be known is to be loved.

Only being seen in part


Being seen can feel uncomfortable, especially if we sense the other has some kind of performance metric in mind. Do I measure up? And we stand with the anxiety that only part of us will be seen. Is that my good side you can see? Yesterday, my friend Richard Merrick reminded me of the beautiful … Read more

The gift of being seen


No one is invisible. It’s just that we don’t see them. We might see a label or a function and miss the person. Or our brain screens out what we might consider a distraction, unimportant or too challenging, because we can’t absorb everything. Yet the gift of being seen is enormous, far more significant than … Read more